It's been a while since I last update myself here. Well, my life gets busier the moment my semester starts. I didn't expect my life in UK to be such hectic. But, all those are gone right now.

Currently, I am having my summer break and I am stuck in this place for 3 months, maybe before my new semester starts again. Why didn't I go for a trip? It's a long story but I'm too lazy to explain things in detailed right now haha.

Everyday I roll on my bed until noon as I am really bored. I got tired of doing what I want. In fact, I don't know what to do. All my friends are not around, they are visiting around Europe haha. There is nothing much to do in Sunderland. Night life is merely clubs and pubs, which I'm not interested at all.

Now, I'm still considering my journey back to Malaysia. But before that, I have to visit Singapore :D. Not sure if I'm making a right decision, that's why it's still in consideration. Should I go back or should I remain here? I have all my time to think until my results in release in end of June. Yeah, I have to pass this finals. I need to. I must to. The feeling of retaking the paper is dreadful, trust me. I really hope all my hard work paid of. To be honest, this is the first time ever I've seen myself so hardworking. I'm not a person who likes to spend my time in the library until I got here lol.

Oh well, let's hope for the best now. Pray hard that I can pass this huge hurdle. Nights..

Cheers

Took a six hours flight from KLIA to Dubai. Wow.. It's harder than I expected. I was so tired before the flight and so I was hoping I could at least get some rest in the plane. Things don't seem to go my way. I could barely sleep. The engine of the plane was quite loud and the passenger behind me hit my chair once a while. I had migraine. Thank God I have panadol with me and without second thought, I just swallowed two pills of that. 

It was 4.20am, Dubai time zone when I reached Dubai airport. That place was damn huge, even bigger than KLIA. Well guess I just follow where my friends are heading. Of course I'm not going there blindly. Got to stay at the airport for about 3 hours before the next flight to New Castle. Well, time flies though and I am now in my next flight to uni.

I was a bit worried to be honest. I don't really feel much excitement as before. First, I don't know who will I be staying with, I don't know my housemates, will they be nice person? I hope to get housemates who are mature and nice, less dramas please... Second, I don't know how or where to start my journey. What should I do the moment I get there?? Friends seems to be together and seriously I don't wanna be left out again like before. I want someone who I could rely on when I need help, someone who will always be there for me and someone like ODF. 

I hope I'm not requesting much. I'm starting to miss my baby. I wonder what is he doing now. Somehow I feel that my body and soul love Singapore a lot. Not because of Glenn and Elaine, but the location. It's near to Malaysia and their culture is the same as Malaysia. I could go anywhere I want at Singapore too. I don't mind it being small, I just want to be happy, like I could really enjoy myself. I know everything it's up to my thinking, that's why I'm trying hard to stay positive. 

Oh God, please let me have a nice journey and life in UK, just for these two years. I'll repay somehow for graduating from this course and be a successful pharmacist. I'll definitely use my skill not for my benefits but others. I wanna be with Glenn too. So for these two years or maybe four, help me make our relationship strong. I feel bad for asking so much but praying is the only thing I could do now. I'd just have to do my best for the rest. Thanks!!

p/s: I'm typing using my iPhone, so it may seems lengthy

Hai!! I guess it had been a long time since my last post. Well I'm sorry as I was busy with lots of stuffs such as exams, trips and preparing myself to study abroad.

Yup! So, I'm in the UK right now. Which part of the UK? Sunderland. Hmm.. I wonder if anyone knows where Sunderland is because it's not really a big city, that's why not many people pay much attention to it. Ok! So it is located to the North East of London, around 45 minutes drive from New Castle. Still don't know where it is?? Here's a picture to it.

I reached here yesterday so I'm still not used to the environment and lifestyle here. No shopping or eating out at night, geez. Most of the shops are closed at 5pm, so we need to rush everything or else we will have to wait until the next day.

I'm staying in the hostel and today a few of the housemates entered. So far, I've talked to two girls. Both of them are from Taiwan, nice isn't it? =) I heard a guy's voice from a room when I was heading to the kitchen so I don't know who's that yet. Well, I love my room and I just want PEACE in my for 9 months, maybe. 

Alright! Got to go.. It's not really late here but I'm pretty tired XD. So tataz..

Report report report report~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!

Why is that I have so much reports to do??????? After report then exam, do I really have the time to study??????

Sigh....

But I found myself starting to slack, I don't know why but I can't seems to find the motivation to go on.

I really need to try my best to find back myself.

Wish me luck..

Approximately another 30 minutes, our dispensing exam is officially ended. I was in the first group so I'm at my home now.

Dispensing exam is indeed a stressful exam that I have to overcome. To overcome my fear and panic. This time, I managed to submit all my prescription but with the last one not completely done. I scribble my answer sheet as I don't have much time to complete it. It was a drug interaction prescription that I did before during practice. I can say that God is being very kind and helpful to me. All lecturers are very helpful and the prescription I got is not that I've yet seen before, maybe one or two which is new to me.

I was panicking and nervous all the way since the exam starts until an hour left before the exam ends. I thought I had the time and so I slowed down my pace. But then only I realised that it needs more time for me to figure out the appropriate drug. I did this before but I forgotten and start panicking even more. My mind was blank. I couldn't think so much and just dispensing both of the drug that have interaction. By that time, I know I'm going to fail this already.

After everything ended, I broke down. I just couldn't take the stress anymore. Friends told me that it's alright not to change the drug, provided I mentioned about preventive measure or extra precaution steps to be taken. I did in my counselling but not knowing if the marker is able to read my handwriting. Then only I recalled back then I left out the solution box empty, which makes me worried even more.

Now, although I've dispense this prescription, there's  a 50 : 50 chance that I'll fail. It's really a great pressure  retaking this exam. Apart from all of these, I'm proud of myself in a way that I managed to dispense 7 completely. Normally, I failed to do that due to lack of understanding. Despite me saying these, I'll be sad if I have to go back once more. Everyone knows how terrible it is. Right now, it's over and the only thing I could do is praying hard that I can pass this, even if its just a borderline pass.

I don't really want anything else except successfully finishing my pharmacy course. I hope God will help me once again and I'm really sorry for asking too much. Like I said, I have 3500 words report waiting for me and I'll be having mock OSCE next week. Studying pharmacy is really a stressful but I know I can do it. My motive is just to graduate and help as many people as I can. I don't care if I'm able to earn lots, most important thing is other people's safety. So, right now let's just all pray that I can pass this dispensing exam and all my other exams successfully with one go. I'll always be gratitude to it.

May God be with us all.

Hi!!

Not going to drag very long this time. I'll be having my very first dispensing exam in few hours time.

Wishing good luck to all my fellow classmates and myself. Let's do this peeps!! We can do it!!

Praying hard at the same time that I CAN COMPLETE ALL IN 3 HOURS AND WITH 100% ACCURACY!! =DD

I need to be cool and calm.

Ok nightss..

I just had my mock dispensing exam and the result is kinda disastrous. I still couldn't manage to finish 8 prescription in 3 hours. We need to do so or else we'll fail. I only manage to complete 5 and out of that, I only got 2 correctly. The remaining 3 is some silly mistakes that made me failed. Oh, we're not allow to made errors by the way, so mean it needs to be 100% correct.

Since this is just a mock, it reflects on how should I study for the actual one on this coming Tuesday. Mr John Sherwood saw me in a paranoid condition and he asked me to calm down LOL. Yah, I really am freaking out right now. Don't even feel like going to Uni actually but that's not something to be discussed *haha*.

I left with few more days before my actual dispensing. There's nothing more I could ask for beside passing this. Even Mr. John also said that this exam it's the greatest pressure most student felt so far, and failing it will be at an even greater pressure. This exam really is pressuring, you can feel the atmosphere is so tense on the day of the mock exam, and it'll be worst on the actual day, as said by Mr. John. Well, I really really really NEED to pass this exam. I know I need to manage my time properly and gain confident into this.

Let's pray hard together. I wish all the best to me and my classmates!

May God help us all.

Then after this exam, I'll be busy with lots of stuffs. My second 3500 words assignment is still on pending. *Remember how I did for the first time?? Stressful~* I've not started it yet and I was informed I'll be needing to submit around mid-April, which is less than a month from now *omg*. I hope I can really finish this by time as it's part of the work for my course. Then, I'll be having OSCE and Law Exam, lastly the final paper. Damn, there're lots of it, isn't it? Time is what I needed the most right now.

Man, I do want to pass this second year smoothly and fly off to UK this August. I only have one wish now, to pass all my exams and GRADUATE smoothly. I really need to put in lots of effort.

May God be with us all.

#prayhard