You forgive me for liking you too much,

And I'll forgive you for not liking me enough.

You forgive me for missing you so,

And I'll forgive you for being so cold.

You forgive me for the loud racing of my heart,

And I'll forgive you for not hearing it. 

You forgive me for playing your games,

And I'll forgive you for toying with my emotions.

You forgive me for finding you so attractive,

And I'll forgive you for not noticing.

You forgive me for raising you up so high,

And I'll forgive you for bringing me down so low.

You forgive me for wanting to be with you,

And I'll forgive you for avoiding me.

You forgive me for being so pathetic,

And I'll forgive you for taking advantage of it.

You forgive me for having hopes and dreams,

And I'll forgive you for crushing them.

Forgiveness brings inner peace.

Do we have a deal?

He doesn't know it..

I can't tell him but......... Just now I think I almost said it out or have he already found out?

It's sad that he prefer calling me that but what can I do? I'm nothing to him. It just aches inside.... Never mind, I'll bear this pain again once more.

Heart sank................

I can never replace that girl..

Never mind, I've been thinking too much all the while. Let's just let my brain rest for the moment. In 2 weeks time I promise myself to stay some distance from him. Need to control myself.... 2 weeks time for me to adapt.

Yea.... I'm just only your friend.

Finally, everything's over - the test, party and the gifts I planned to give.

Best day in Uni ever where you're accompanied by so many people until the middle of the night. I'm so glad that everyone was having a lot of fun. Special thanks to Zac, JD, Lourene, Celine, Derrick, Anchalee, Adelyn, Matthias and Agilan for making this a successful and splendid Christmas party. Though each person only has a small duty to do, but without any of them, this party will definitely get into chaos.

The most interesting part is that I'm really touched by their expressions when I gave them the gifts. It doesn't matter to me if they want to give me back a gift, it's really just from the bottom of my heart that I wanted to give them. Hmm.. I don't know how to express the feelings I'm having right now, but seriously I'm really happy and touched when each person hugs me and say thank you, and that's enough for me, I don't need more than that.

And, I'm really really really glad that he likes it. So worried that he'll think that I shouldn't spent money on buying things for him. I'm not doing that for a motive, it's just out of sincerity that I wanted to give him. Or.......... maybe......... hmm........... well...... doesn't matter anyway, don't think it will happen. As long he's happy, I'm happy.

My heart is feeling so contented right now =)

Song of the day:

Test~! Finally over...... phewwwww.. tiring.. No mood to eat this morning and lunch, just had a drink at Starbucks, ends up hungry and tired now.

Test results...................... I pass!! but................. not that good *TT* A significant drop in my results~ Sad, but I know there're others who are more sad than me. Good luck guys! and to my dear L <3, you sure can pass this Friday~ If you pass (getting more than 85), I'll treat you eat Korean foods ><. That's my promise~!

No time for me to retake the test as I have reports and Christmas event to settle. Never mind, let's just do this and once for all!

Muscular skeleton (on muscle) --> muscular skeleton (on joint) --> central nervous system (introduction) --> central nervous system (neurotransmitter)

With all these, I can feel my head is spinning. CNS on neurotransmittre..... one word... *vomit blood*. I have no idea what is all about, all I know is the neurotransmitter, and then something about their pathway which I don't understand a single thing, too many terminology for brains which makes me almost go cuckoo . Now if I try to recall what I've read, I will go hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm................. *thinking of what is this and that* 

Tomorrow's the test!! It's finally here LOL.. I need to pass for this first time, so I can continue doing my things especially preparation for Christmas party (coming this Friday) which also gives me another headache. *breath in, breath out, you can do it Nicole* Alright!! I will do my best and pass it and once for all saying goodbye to the test!!~~

OK! time to go back to cardiovascular system 1, 2 and 3 @.@

"当一切结束后，我们可以回到以前的我们吗？你走你的，我走我的..."

Can we ever go back to normal after everything ends? You walk your path and I walk mine..