Dear blog,

Today is the day where I'll be getting my AS results. I've been working hard for this exam and am confidence with myself to get all As, not to say I'm over confidence.

At first all of us decide to check our results after our BBQ session but I think when everyone is getting their results, this will make other people, like me to check also. I asked Mei Yin to check for me but since she can't enter, I have to do it myself.

I asked Mr. Siva to check for me. It's indeed a nervous time. I'm hoping to see all As in it. Elly and I wrote our name on a piece of paper and pass it to Mr. Siva.

When I got back my results, my heart eventually stopped. I don't know what else to say. I felt a warm feeling covering my whole body and disappear. I seriously can't believe my eyes what was written on that piece of paper, with my grades beside my name.

I have no mood to study at all so I decided to skip my tutorial class. Not many people enter that class either. When I got back, I checked the website to confirm my results. I just hope that what Mr. Siva written on that paper is not right.

It's correct after all. That's the results I'm having, my record in Cambridge International Examination. This is something that I can't run away anymore.. I have to accept the fact and face the reality.

This is the results I got:



I really don't know what else to do or to say. I expect to get all As but I got all Bs. I doubt the effort that I put in.

Many of my friends told me that it's not a bad results. Maybe it's not that bad after all but why am I still not satisfied?

Because I fear...

I fear that I'm not able to maintain this grades in my overall A level. This is just the beginning. That's why I'm hoping high for my this AS. I expected Chemistry to get A.

I also fear that with my this results, I'm not able to enter a good Uni to study what I want.

I fear about my future.

Though people always say that life is full of challenges and we have to be part of it.

People may say that I'm complaining though I got a not that bad results. I'm having pressure myself. I think my parents are all putting expectation on me. But it looks like I failed them this time.

Looks like I really have to put extra effort on my A2. If you ask me whether or not to retake, I can say I don't know for the time being.

Now, I'm just hoping to make my A2 to be a total miracle. I hope my parents are understanding enough. Don't lecture me or I'll start to cry.

Dear blog,

I went to PC fair with Elly and her family yesterday. There're so many things to see. I think both of us have our own things to buy.
Me - external hard disk, keyboard protector and a thumbdrive for my brother.
Elly - lap top

I reached there around 2pm and immediately meet Elly. After that, we walked to the KL Convention Centre. Hmm... There're seriously so many people but I believe that amount is consider as less.

The first floor we went is the hall selling TV and other stuffs. Well, I bought my hard disk there from Seagate. I wanted to buy 320gb for RM198 but there're no more stock. So after the promoter introduce, I decided to buy 500gb hard disk for RM225 without any hesitation. He offered me 33 bucks. After I buy, I was worried that my dad or brother will scold because we discussed it before that I will only need 320gb but I bought 500gb. Elly is smart, she convinced me that it's cheaper. Just pay another 25 bucks to get 500gb and 5 years warranty.

I love my new hard disk. Now I can finally put all my stuffs in it ad without anyone telling me to clear my folders xD.

Well, as for Elly. I think she had a little hard time. She doesn't know what brand lap top she wants to buy. If for me, I think I'll go for Alienware, but this depends on her. Plus, she need approval from her mom to buy it. So after a long discussing with her family, her mom agrees to buy her one. Her old one is really old, and even the repair technician ask her to change. She chose Dell, which I think it's suitable for her though I not sure whether will it last long.

So, I think all of us got what we wanted. I think my next aim will be Alienware lap top.

ALIENWARE! Wait for me~

Meet my silver hard disk~

I got back my Pure Maths paper today!
Guess what...
I got 11/27
hmm... 11/27 x 50 = 20

In conclusion....
Applied Maths + Pure Maths = 15.5 + 20 = 35.5

MEANS...........
I failed~~~~

Looks like I have to really really work hard if I want to succeed in A2

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Dear blog,

Many things happen recently. I wanted to write something on blogspot, but I don't know why my dad's lap top is unable to load the page. This really frustrated me . So, I decide to use my dad's netbook.

30/7/2010 (Friday)

Chui Yee told me a shocking news when we were in canteen. She showed me her SMS she received from Shin Cher.

Today will be my last day coming to college. I will drop A level next week.

I'm not sure about the exact message but this is what the message mean. It was so shocking that I thought she's joking, but the message don't sound funny .
When everyone knew about this, they're certainly shocked.
Anyway Shin Cher, we will miss you~~!! Looks like she has joined the Russian's gang


2/8/2010 (Monday)

It's finally in the month pf August. Time flies really fast. This means that I'll be.....

getting my AS results in approximately a week time
sitting for my trial in 2 months time
sitting for my A2 in 2 1/2 months time
lastly...
graduating from TARC

Anyway, I got back my Applied Maths today. I can say that it's a total disaster. I can't believe I failed my Applied Maths, 9/29 = 15.5/50. What kind of result is this I thought. It's not that I didn't study, I don't understand the question. Maybe this is just an excuse, every well then, I shall say I didn't do my tutorial and thus not enough practice . So I think I really have to push myself if not .

I BELIEVE PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT !

I think that's all I want to say. So good luck to me in my AS results which will be release in the net on 12/8/2010 (Thursday)

We must be

Dear blog,

Okay!!! Test 6 is finally over. I soo in love with this now. Chemistry had been bothering me for so long and now it's over =)

AS results is coming out... Everyone said that they will not score well for their test. The only think that I wish to say is, I'll see about it lol. I try not to think all the bad stuffs for it. This will definitely going to make me go crazier.

I think it's time to pay more attention in my works. A pile of homeworks are waiting for me, pure maths, applied maths etc. I believe I won't have the time to complete it once I got the past year papers. Who will bother about those tutorials?? Everyone will be doing past years only. However, my basic is totally sucks so I think I got to get down to business.

Less time online gaming
Less time playing facebook
NO MORE the SIMS!!!! (sob)
p/s: I deleted it because I screwed up the whole folder lol

Dear blog,

I can't believe myself for getting mad at someone for no valid reason.
It's actually I'm the one who's in guilt yet I blame it on someone.
This is all because I can't get what I desire, what I want and what I'm desperate for.

I expect people to spoonfeed me, even without trying to do.
I expect people to pity me, and throw my tamtrum if I don't get it.

I'm deperate and stress out now.
This test really going to kill me, not to say A2
People said is just a small test, but I always take it seriously.
I told my mom that it's just a small test and bo big deal, but she said still insists me to do well.

I thought I'm able to score for my Applied Maths today but I was wrong.
I now realise that I shouldn't have get mad at him, it's not his fault after all.
I really desperate in my marks now that I could do something so silly and naive.

What's wrong with me??
I have no idea.

Why would you always like to put the blame on me??
Do you think I would want the accident to happen?
If what had happen then let it be, no point looking back.

Why would you always say I'm the cause of everything?
Why can't you just say some supportive words?
What happened to me is indirectly related to you, do you know that?
I bet you don't know, because you wouldn't bother anything that happen.

Just stop putting blames on me.
I also want to go out and go home safely.
Stop saying I'm troublesome.
You always have the responsibility to look after me.

After all, you're my brother.